


Elorcan Part one: Back to Morath

by iheart_my_fandoms



Category: Throne of Glass Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: F/M, Multi, Sarah J Maas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-15
Updated: 2017-04-15
Packaged: 2018-10-19 10:16:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10637811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iheart_my_fandoms/pseuds/iheart_my_fandoms
Summary: During the war against the Valg and Maeve, Elide is finding a way to heal from the things done to her at Morath. She needs someone to help her and Lorcan just so happens to be right next door.





	1. Elorcan Fanfiction: Back to Morath

**Author's Note:**

> All characters belong to Sarah J Maas

It had been a long day, but Elide didn’t mind, she liked working. Labor took her mind off of everything that she was trying to run from. She knew that even with Rowan’s valiant efforts, the search for Aelin was not going well. Elide couldn’t help but blame herself for what was happening to her queen. It should have been her. Elide should have been in that coffin, Elide should have been being tortured.

With Aelin, she was still struggling with nightmares regarding everything that had happened in Morath. Vernon still crept into her mind when the darkness was all you could see. The valg roared in her dreams and tears covered her pillows nearly every night.

That night was no different. She felt valg hands on her body and laughing along with them. She knew they found her body amusing. Then they started being rough with her, those dark princes. They pushed her aggressively and the one that had her hips in his hands tightened his grip to the point that she knew there would be bruises.

“Look at me,” one with lust in his eyes said and lifted her chin to his face. It was twisted in evil, he was a man that was probably once handsome, but now he was covered in scars and his nose was crooked. “Let me go!” She screamed. Elide started to kick and scream.

“Your no fun.” One of them said as he loosened his grip. “I doubt she would be, even if she tried. Look at her.” The scarred one said and began to laugh. Her body was amusing. “If that’s a woman, than I’ve never seen one,” someone behind her said. Elide blushed with shame. Then a valg in front of her grabbed her and said, “Well, she’s the best we’ve got.”

Elide began to kick and scream, attempting to get out of his grip. He kept a firm hold on her and chuckled lightly. She felt hot tears stream down her cheeks as she thrashed against him. Then, more of them grabbed her, more touched her naked body.

“ELIDE! Wake up!” She heard a voice say, fortunately waking her from her dream. She could feel the tears that she carried from her dream soaking her pillow. Elide was thankful that she was away from those awful creatures, until she noticed that the person that woke her up was the one person that she hated to see. Lorcan.

“What the hell are you doing here? This is my room.” They were staying on a ship and had each been granted a room. She was on the upper deck, and she thanked the gods for that. She could easily walk out of her room for some fresh air and be already on the decks. Sea air had been proved nice after nightmares. “I was going out for some fresh air when I heard you screaming.”

Elide wiped her tears and sat up. “Well, I’m fine. You can leave now.” She wanted nothing more than for him to get out. Elide wanted to hate Lorcan for summoning Maeve, but it was quite a task. She never forgot that first kiss that Lorcan had granted her, and never really stopped longing for more. “You are not fine. What were you dreaming about.”

His voice was so… Lorcan, and she loved that voice. Elide wanted nothing more than for her mouth to stay shut, but her tongue betrayed her. “Something that happened in Morath.” She looked down at her hands that were folded in her lap, atop her silk nightgown. Manon had brought back some lavish dresses and jewelery when she finally came back from wherever it was she was going, only to leave again soon after.

“Still? I thought those nightmares were going away.”

“They were, and then they came back.”

“Why?”

She didn’t want to tell Lorcan that the night mares were back because she was sleeping alone in her room, no one to protect her. She hated that, the fact that she needed to feel protected, but Elide knew that it was really only at night.

“Will you sleep in here for the rest of the night?” Elide asked, hating the words but loving them at the same time. “Of course.” He said, and she almost let herself smile.


	2. Elorcan Part 2: Worthless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With Lorcan and Elide growing closer, she must open up to him. This leads to some... interesting advances.

Lorcan had gladly taken the floor. Elide knew that he would have slept on a bed of nails if only he could be near her. She had to admit that the sound of his breathing was enough to scare her nightmares away. Elide barely dreamt while he was on the ground next to her bed.

He had laid on the floor for three weeks straight without complaining, he never really said much at all. Lorcan spoke to Elide only when Elide started the conversation, which was rare. Although his presence was encouraged, she still didn’t talk to him much at all. Elide was still working on forgiving him, and that task was not an easy one. When she would see him getting up in the morning or walking around the decks, she nearly forgot the damage that he had done, but it always burned in the back of her mind.

Every time she thought she hated him, she tried to remind herself that he meant no harm when he called Maeve, he wanted them safe, he wanted his friends away from Erawan. He cared enough about them to call her, his bitch queen that had ordered his death. Elide knew this and it had been months since the whole thing happened, but when she still struggled with knowing that while he meant to help, he did nothing but hurt. He hurt her and Aelin and Rowan and Aedion and Lysandra. He was unsure how harmed her Wing Leader was, but she knew that she longed for the lost queen. The war was not going well without her.

One night after many weeks of Lorcan sleeping on the floor, he didn’t show up to bed. Elide sat up on her mattress, unable to sleep without him. She had become accustomed to having him there, and when he wasn’t there, she felt that she was missing something. Lorcan was the same as a dream catcher for Elide, she hadn’t had a nightmare since Lorcan took to her floor.

After what felt like hours of waiting for him to come to the room, Elide got up and went to look for him. It didn’t take long. Lorcan was standing on the edge of the boat, his arms resting on the rails that kept him from falling straight into the ocean. “Are you going to come to bed?” Elide whispered as she walked up to the male. The sea air engulfed her and she closed her eyes to savor it.

“No.” Lorcan said shortly. He didn’t look up from the water.

Elide stood with him, suddenly aware of her attire. She was in a pink nightgown that the kind shifter, Lysandra, had given her. She was a very kind woman, but she had rarely spoken to her. The nightgown was short, exposing her legs, and more noticeably, her ankle. She had taken off the fabric that bound her breasts to her body for sleep. She found that it was most comfortable. The gown was low cut on the top so her breasts were some what revealed, but not enough that she cared too much about it. Looking at her appearance, it might have been seductive, she thought, but that was not the intention. “Why not?”

Lorcan finally looked at her, sympathy in his eyes. “Elide, it’s torture.”

Elide was slightly taken aback. “If the floor is all that bad, then you can sleep in the bed.” She nearly winced at the words. Elide knew that him on the floor was enough temptation, but anything to keep him there. “Not the floor. It’s being so close to you and not being able to even touch you. Not being able to comfort you, or talk to you! Gods, it’s killing me.”

That was not what she expected, but it wasn’t like she hated the words. He hadn’t forgotten what was between them, even after all those months. “You can. Touch me, talk to me.”

Elide knew that her heart had forgiven Lorcan a long time ago, but her mind was a little late on the matter. “You hate me.”

“No, I don’t.”

“You should.”

“I know that what happened was not your goal.”

It was then that Lorcan looked Elide over and his mouth opened slightly. “Gods, why do you do this to me?” He put his forefinger to his temple.

“What? I told you that I’m hardly upset.”

“I mean the gods damned gown. I swear you want me in more pain.”

Elide looked down, then tried to cover her legs with no avail. “Sorry, this is Lysandra’s.”

“Explains a lot.” Lorcan smirked, but Elide didn’t look too much into the comment, she didn’t want to. “I don’t mean to put you through this.”

“I know.” His sinful eyes traced her body, up and down. Up again, finally landing on her chest. This was so far off from her intention.

Elide pulled the dress up, trying to hide herself from his eyes. She flushed with shame of her body. She had never forgotten that Valgs words. “If that’s a woman, then I’ve never seen one.” She never forgot their laughter, never forgot that those men thought her body was a joke.

“Don’t be ashamed. You have a quite nice body.”

“You haven’t seen it’s full extent.” Those Valg had seen her totally bare, and mocked her. He scoffed, “Right you are. But I have never been as sure as I am that the full extent of your body is as beautiful as I imagine.”

She tried to smile at his words, but the good that he had spoken were drowned out by the echoes of laughter and those comments that had been made. She was disgusting. She was so ugly and unwanted, and those men had told her so. As Elide remembered the words, tears welled in her eyes. She would never be as beautiful as Lysandra or as strong as Aelin. She would never have wit like Manon or be willing like Kaltain. She would never be as brave as her mother. Those princes had confirmed it.

“Elide? What’s the matter?”

Before the first tear could fall, Elide ran back to her rooms. She jumped onto her bed and began to weep into her pillow. It was all her fault, everything that was happening to Aelin. She was worthless and stupid and it should have been her.

There was a knock on her door, and before she could tell him to go away, Lorcan walked in and walked over to her.


	3. Elorcan Fanfiction: Beautiful

Elide… Talk to me.” Lorcan whispered as he kneeled down next to Elides bed.

The girl kept crying, it began to border on a sob. She hated that he got to see her like that, so vulnerable and weak. What she hated more than that was the fact that she was all of those things, she was weak and she was vulnerable.

Elide hid her face in a pillow, hoping that if she didn’t respond then Lorcan would go away. He didn’t. “Hey,” his voice was so soft when he spoke, like he really cared. “It’s okay.” Elide was sure that she had never heard Lorcan sound so sympathetic and true.

“No, it’s not. And it never will be.” Elide finally looked up at the male, who’s eyes showed genuine concern. “What won’t? Won’t you just tell me what’s the matter?”

Elide’s breathing slowed, her tears still falling, but not as many as previously. She sat up slowly, trying to think of how to explain what was really wrong. Lorcan was still kneeling when Elide sat up and he looked up at her and put his callused hand on her knee, for support she supposed.

Elide wiped her tears and sniffled, then cleared her throat. “Those nightmares, the ones I was having before you started sleeping in here, they were more like memories,” she fought back tears, “of things that happened back in—“ she couldn’t say it. Not the name of that gods damned place where she was forced to spend her childhood.

“Morath.” Lorcan finished for her.

“They stick, those things. What happened there.”

He squeezed her leg when he spoke next. “What happened in Morath, Elide?”

She hesitated, she should not have told him, it was stupid and personal and he was this strong fae that had no reason to care. She was vulnerable and she needed someone to talk to, so what if it was him? “The men, the valg seemed to enjoy me.” Lorcan looked suddenly angry, very angry. “Not like that. They… Were amused by me.” Elide looked down at her hands, fighting the urge to break into a sob. Tears did fall, and she was not ashamed of those drops of warm liquid that fell from her onyx eyes. She was not ashamed, and of anything she was proud that she did not go into a state of hysterical sobbing. “They would—“ gods it was so difficult to say. “They would strip me of my clothing, all of it. Then they would touch me, gods did they touch me,” Elide remembered how hard their grips were, she remembered the bruises they left on her body. “They didn’t take me, though, they didn’t take me because they didn’t want me.” Elide cried harder then.

Lorcan sat there, as patient as ever, willing to wait as long as Elide needed.

“Those men made such remarks about me. About why they didn’t want me.”

“What did they say to you?” Lorcan pushed, but Elide didn’t mind, she kind of liked that he cared, it eased some of her suffering. “Lots of things. They asked if I was really a full grown woman, if I had even bled yet.”

“How can someone see you and ask that?” Lorcan said.

While her breasts were full and her curves were plentiful, they had still asked her that, and at first she knew that they were just asking to make her upset, she knew that it was a lie, at first. The more they asked, the more she started to doubt the truth. After nearly a year of it, she truly believed that she looked like a small girl, and that she was unattractive to men.

“They called me ugly and a joke, they laughed at me. They looked at me and actually laughed.”

Then she let the tears fall. Lorcan got up from where he was kneeling to sit next to her, to hold Elide. She fell into him, she sobbed into his chest, and he stroked her back and hair. “Oh my Elide. You can’t believe what they said, you must know that you’re beautiful.”

Elide shook her head up against his chest and only cried louder. “You are the most beautiful woman that I have ever laid eyes upon. You are a gift from the gods themselves.”

Her breathing slowed, but she was still crying. Elide looked up to his face, barely able to look into his eyes, but somehow managed. “You’ve seen women from every land in this world, you have bedded most of them, all of them so much prettier than I am. There is no way that I am the most gorgeous woman that you have ever seen.”

“Oh, Elide.” He cupped her face in his hands, and looked her in the eyes. “I have seen women from lands that you don’t even know exist, I have bedded women with sinful smiles and elaborate hairstyles, but none of them compare to you.”

She wanted with all her heart to believe him, but what those valgs said, it really stuck. They had seen her bare, whereas Lorcan had merely seen what she wanted him to. She had control and that was something that she never had before, but eventually, as all men do Lorcan would want control. He would want things that Elide couldn’t give.

“No. You—you don’t know.”

“Elide, I know. I know that you are the kindest most caring and brave person that I have ever met. Before you I didn’t know what it was to care, to love, to truly love. You were right, love should make you happy, and you should know that I am only truly happy when I am with you.”

Then, without much thought or effort at all, she kissed him. And he kissed her back. It was passion and love and hope all in one. It was true happiness. From when their lips first touched that night so many months ago. They finally both got what they had been waiting for.

When they finally separated, he was smiling wider than she’d ever seen him. “I’ve been waiting a long time for that.” He said.

“Do you maybe want to sleep in the bed tonight?” Elide said shyly. Of course he did. It should not have even been a question. “If you insist.”


	4. Elorcan fanfiction: The Lagoon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lorcan and elide go out of their way to have some fun.

The whole “sleeping together without sleeping together” thing was going well, from what Elide could tell. 

They had kissed a lot more, but other than that Lorcan was giving her space, not asking for any more than she would give him. She knew that she wanted him, but she was not sure if she wanted to give herself to Lorcan, if she would ever want to give herself to anyone. Elide had everything taken away from her. Her childhood, her confidence, even her ability to walk properly. She had herself left, and giving that away would be a struggle for her, but she knew that she would... Eventually. 

Rowan had come with news of Maeve and Aelin’s whereabouts. They were far off, but Rowan took off with Aedion and an army. They were going to get her queen, and while Elide was not fit for such a long journey and what promised to be an intense battle, she was ecstatic that she would soon be reunited with her queen. The effort would most likely take many weeks, maybe months, but what was that compared to a whole lifetime with Aelin? With that, Lorcan would also be staying behind, for the obvious reasons.

Rowan still nearly killed him every time they crossed paths and she knew that while Aelin may have understood his reasons for summoning Maeve and forgiven him, which she most likely did, Rowan would not forgive so easily. Not to mention that he would have to face Maeve, and he seemed to have just recently gotten over the devastation of her breaking their bond. It was the two of them, but Elide wasn’t arguing. Elide was glad that Lorcan could roam freely about the ship without worrying about, well, being killed.

She had taken a liking to the deck, she enjoyed the way it felt to be out in the sea air. The way it made her hair feel and how clean she felt being just outside. In order for Aedion and Rowan to get off of the boat and be aware of where to find it, they docked on an island that she had never heard of. Maybe that was why they docked there, because it was remote and there was little chance of anyone finding them.

“Hey,” Lorcan walked up to Elide, making her jump.

“Sorry,” he said before he gave her a quick kiss on the lips. Nobody lived on the island that they could see. People had gone out and there were no inns for miles, they were stuck sleeping on the boat, but they could go out and explore the island, swim if they wanted. She could see a lagoon in the far distance, and even from where she was standing, it looked beautiful. Elide was dying to see it up close.

“Are you ready to go?” He asked while smiling at her.

“Yes.”

They walked off of the boat while laughing about something that Elide had said, it was hard to stay focused, though, the way he looked at her was just very distracting. He could make her forget where Aelin was and what Aedion and Rowan would have to do to get her back. Made her forget that the Aelin that she saw roaming the ship was a mere shifter. It was just her and him when they laughed. It was just happiness and fun, it was just Lorcan and Elide.

“So where exactly are we going?” Lorcan said after a stint of laughter. “Just wait.” Elide said as she tugged on his arm so they could both go into a run for the lagoon. 

It didn’t take long to reach the body of water. It was beautiful. The water was so clear, and the place was so secluded, it was so satisfying. “Wow…” Lorcan was speechless.

“You want to get in?” She asked, knowing that he wouldn’t say no. “In our clothes?” He smirked.

She hesitated, “Yes, in our clothes.” Elide said, turning the conversation a bit more serious. “You don’t swim… In clothes,” Lorcan pushed.

“Well, I do,” Elide said defiantly. Maybe Lorcan did find her beautiful, but she still feared his opinion on her bare. “Elide, it would be a better experience, swimming in this gorgeous lagoon, if you weren’t weighed down by your clothes.” His eyes weren’t filled with lust, though, but genuine concern. Lorcan was not interested in seeing what Elide harbored under her tunic and pants, he was interested in ensuring that she enjoyed her time with him, but she didn’t care much of his intentions. She would not have undressed if anyone else was there, either. Maybe Manon, because Manon wouldn’t care, she wouldn’t judge her. 

“I think I’ll enjoy the experience just fine dressed.”

“Fine,” he said as he took of his shirt to reveal his toned upper body. Elide almost forgot what had just happened when she saw him. He had to have been a god himself, the way he looked. A smile returned to the male’s face as he jumped into the water from where he was standing. “Are you just going to stand there, or are you going to join me?” Lorcan yelled from below her.

Elide smiled. “No,” she said as soon as her feet left the surface. The air rushed her down, but she did not forget to savor the trip down. She felt weightless, like she was flying, but she wasn’t, she was plummeting. But she liked it, she loved it.

Elide crashed into the water and sank low into the water, and she observed it. The water was clear and underneath the surface was just as amazing as above it. Her lungs gave out too quickly and she eventually had to rise above the water. “Great, wasn’t it?”

Elide pushed her wet hair from her face and said, “Fantastic.” Elide could not wipe the smile off her face. Neither could Lorcan.

For hours they swam and laughed. They saw who could hold their breath the longest and raced across the water like children. They played under water tag which ended with Lorcan grabbing Elide’s foot and pulling her into a kiss while they were still beneath the surface. Then they moved to above the lagoon.

Lorcan could stand in the shallow end of the water, whereas Elide could not, so he lifted her up, letting her wrap her legs around his waist. This made kissing loads easier and it allowed for it to be deep and passionate. As she opened her mouth to him, he groaned in her mouth, he wanted her. She knew that she wanted him, but she was not sure if she wanted to give herself to Lorcan, if she would ever want to give herself to anyone.

Elide’s hands were in Lorcan’s hair, and his hands gripped her backside. Leaving Elide breathless, Lorcan moved his mouth from her lips and onto her neck. She wanted more of him, all of him.

“Maybe we should finish this back on the boat,” Elide said, totally breathless. She was almost sure that she wanted it, but she figured that she would never be completely certain of such a decision. 

Lorcan was quick to agree. 

And he carried her, with his speed so much greater than hers, all the way back to their room.


	5. Elorcan Fanfiction: Back to the Boat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lorcan and Elide head back to the boat for some sexy fun.

Lorcan thought he might have died on the way back to the boat, he wished he could have taken her right there in that lagoon. Elide’s clothes clinging to her body and her legs around him, he thought he might die when she suggested going back to the boat, but whatever she wanted, he would give her.

Lorcan had decided long before he even kissed her all those months ago that anything Elide ever wanted or needed, he would go to a million different realms to get it to her. He would blackmail, torture, and kill for her if that’s what she asked. It was already decided that Vernon would die at his hands, and the more the woman told him, the more blood his hands were promised.

He ran as fast as he could back to the room, gods help anyone who even tried to get in his way. Lorcan wanted her, and the second she asked to go back to her bed, she knew that he wanted him, too. Of course he would go slow, he hadn’t forgotten that she did not yet know the ways of the bedroom, and he would make sure that before he taught her, he knew exactly what she wanted to learn. He would stop when she said stop and go when she said go. He knew that Elide needed as much control as she could get, and no matter what, he would not forget that.

 

As Lorcan carried her back to their room, she became increasingly unsure of what she was willing to do with the male, of what she was willing to give. Was she truly ready to surrender herself to him. She loved him, of that she was sure, but might have been the only thing that she was certain of. Yes, she wanted him, yes there was lust mixed with the love, but when it came down to it, in that moment that she had the choice, she didn’t know what it would be.

When they arrived at the room, Elide partially dry, Lorcan locked his lips with hers once again and laid her on the bed. With him above her, she kissed him, but when his lips slid down to her neck, she nearly asked him to stop. She was quite alone in the fact that she had clothes on, he had no shirt on, but Elide was not arguing. Until he tried to lift her shirt. That’s when she grabbed his hands and shook her head. “I can’t,” she said, breathless.

“Elide, don’t be scared for me to see you,” he reassured, but his words didn’t change her opinion in the least bit. “You—“

“Don’t know? Gods, Elide, I thought we went over this. You are beautiful and sexy and there is no way that what is under that shirt will change that, if anything it will amplify.”

Gods, she wanted him, but her safety net, her clothes were what she needed, and shedding them for Lorcan was not going to be an easy task. “I don’t mean to push you, I just want to make sure that you feel safe with me,” He said softly.

Then, without much thought, she kissed him lightly, delicately. “I love you,” Elide said onto his lips.

“You don’t have to do anything,” Lorcan said, his voice smaller than a whisper. But she wanted to and the want was burning so deep that clothes started to seem like a stupid and small obstacle. Before she knew it, her shirt was coming off slowly. When she felt the air hit her stomach, she broke the kiss that had just been reconnected. Elide didn’t ask to stop but she did need somewhat of a breather. Then before he could decide for her that she wasn’t ready, she took off that thin layer of fabric that hoisted her breasts up, she did it quickly, she needed it done if she didn’t do it fast, she wasn’t sure that she would do it at all.

Lorcan looked down at her, and it took everything in her not to cover her face with her hands, but she didn’t, Elide watched him look at her and fear welled up inside her when he didn’t say anything.

Finally he said in what sounded like awe, “Beautiful.”

She smiled and pulled him back into a kiss, trying not to feel stupid for being so scared for so long of what he would think of her. He found her beautiful and what more could she ask for?

Lorcan made his way down to her neck, his lips then lower, kissing her breasts. No one had ever done that, and gods it was amazing. She let out a moan as he massaged her nipple with his mouth and if she didn’t want him before, she sure as hell wanted him then.

His sinful, sinful mouth then grazed her stomach and he took off her pants slowly, kissing her legs as he went. Elide barely noticed when he made his way back up her body and sometime when she was lost in pleasure and want his pants met hers on the floor.

Then, his mouth traced the inside of her thigh, teasing her to where she thought she would go insane. She was breathing so heavily, her lungs full of want just like the rest of her body. “Lorcan,” she begged, and he was quick to oblige. As soon as the words escaped her lips, he reached the apex of her thighs and Elide thought she might die from the mere pleasure.

Elide moaned, calling his name with a fiery passion that she had never imagined she would experience. That sinful mouth.

After minutes, she felt release and she went to a place, so amazing that she might have seen Mala herself.

Lorcan looked up at her and smiled. That gods forsaken smile. “I love you so much, Elide.” Lorcan said through kisses back up her stomach. When he met her mouth, he smiled again and she kissed him like she had never kissed him before. Elide displayed thanks and love and hope and healing in that kiss.

She felt him hard against her. “Are you ready?”

She wanted more of him, all of him, and she told him just that.

Slowly, he inched his way inside her and he was barely in when the pain begun. It wasn’t torture, but it was not pleasant. She winced and balled her hands into fists, fighting the urge to cry. “Are you okay,” he said onto her neck. Elide nodded. “Keep going,” she demanded, she knew that after the pain, there would be pleasure. As Lorcan moved farther into her, tears welled in her eyes, but he only kissed her through the pain, he only tried to ease it.

Soon, his long length was fully inside her and after a couple thrusts, the pain turned to what was a slight pleasure to then the best feeling she had ever experienced. As their bodies moved together, they both released moans of pleasure and when her climax reached, she thought he would be done as well, but he was still going strong. The next time she felt the blissful release, he felt it, too.

Lorcan entertained her through the night and well after dawn.


	6. Elorcan Fanfiction: Regret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Does Elide regret what she did when she came back to the boat?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the final chapter! Ahhhhh! Enjoy.

Lorcan woke up next to his lovely Elide and watched her as she slept. Gods, she was beautiful.

She seemed so peaceful, like there was not a battle occurring halfway across the continent, like the most powerful queen of all the land, lost. He hoped her dreams were of a different world, a better world. He hoped that while her days were plagued by the struggles of the realm, that her nights were not.

He hoped that he could help keep her mind away from such problems when the sun came down. He hoped that he could be a distraction, and he knew that the previous night, he was. He loved being her distraction, especially because he knew that he was so much more than that. He loved her.

Lorcan thought that he would never find love apart from Maeve, but when he met Elide, he knew that what he had thought he felt for Maeve was not love. Elide had opened his eyes. She was right, love should make you happy, and every second that he was with Elide, he was sure that there was no male happier than him. Lorcan had never laughed harder or smiled bigger than when he was with the half - blood witch.

When she opened her onyx eyes, every thought in his head froze. All he could think of was her and her smile and her laugh, yet she had barely opened her eyes.

 

When Elide opened her eyes, the first thing she saw was Lorcan looking down at her. She smiled up at him and he smiled back. “How are you?” He asked.

How was she expected to answer that? She wasn’t exactly phenomenal, even with the sleep that she got, the night prior had exhausted her, and she was still tired beyond reason. She wasn’t doing awful, she had fun the night before. She didn’t regret it, not really. But she had given herself to him, she was hers, she had given up control. Did she regret it?

“Fine.”

The male raised his eyebrows. “Fine?”

“I think I need some more sleep, that was one ravenous night you gave me.”

She turned away from him and sighed. She had given him the one thing that she had left, now what was she? What had she demolished herself to? Sleep found her before she could think too much more.

 

A knock on her door woke her. She opened her eyes to see Lorcan asleep next to her, and from what she could see, there was no chance of him awakening just because there was a knock on the door.

As quietly as she could, Elide got out of the bed, put on a long shirt, and opened the door. It took everything in her not to scream with joy as she saw who was waiting for her. Manon.

She closed the door and hugged her tightly. “What are you doing here?” Elide said, fighting back tears of joy.

“I was on my way to meet Rowan and the army, but you were on the way, so I decided that we should catch up before battle.”

“How did you find the boat.”

“Rowan, he thought that I might want to stop by so he told me where might find you.”

The witch was exactly as she remembered her. Beautiful, but lethal.

“What of Dorian?”

“The Princeling?”

“Yes, wasn’t he traveling with you?”

“Ah, yes. The princeling has found a way to entertain himself, and I suspect he will not bother us for as long as I am here.”

Manon looked her up and down. “So the demi-fae is in there?”

“How---“

“You know how. Gods, you reek of him. But that’s beside the point, how about we go somewhere and talk? It’s been a long while since we have done just that.”

Elide knew just the place, it was down the deck and it had a perfect outlook on the ocean. They sat in some very nice chairs and began their conversation. Manon did not wait for her to mention the obvious.

“How long have you been sleeping with the male?”

Elide looked down at her hands, thinking of the night before. “The first time was last night.” Her voice was shaky, almost embarrassed to admit it to her friend. “And how are you?” The Wing Leader asked, no judgement coating her voice. “I don’t know.” Elide still didn’t look at Manon.

“What do you know?” Now the witch sounded concern. Genuine concern, something that Elide had seen very few times from the witch. “I know that I love him,” Elide said softly.

“Do you really? This kind of thing isn’t black and white, there’s so much more to it than just wanting someone.”

“Trust me, I know, and I’m not confused. I am in love with him. I am so madly, intensely, heart- breakingly in love with him, and that is one thing that I am sure of. I didn’t think that it was possible, I thought that finding him with the life I’ve had, the things I’ve been put through, was impossible.” She didn’t lie. Elide wasn’t sure when she had fallen in love with him, or if there was even an exact moment. All she really knew was that sometime between when she first knew a male was following her and when they had swam in that lagoon, she had fallen in love.

“So than what’s the problem? You love him, what, were you planning on waiting? You know that the Fae don’t marry, they mate. There would be no point in waiting.”

“No, I defiantly was not planning on waiting, and I know that it’s against his tradition to marry. It’s just, I had that, you know? My virtue, it was the one thing I had left. My childhood is gone, my self-esteem demolished, hell, I was stripped of my ability to walk. They locked me in the dark for years, they tried to impregnate me with Valg children. I barely had myself when I met him, but the one thing that I did still have, the one thing that had not been forced away from me was my virtue. And now it’s gone, so what is it that I have left?

“Yes, I love him, I love with every piece of my broken heart, every single piece that were made in Morath. I love him with the piece that the Valg men tore off, and the piece that Vernon shattered. I love him, so I should be happy that I—well, you know. Shouldn’t I?” Elide let a tear fall hot down her face.

“You are fixing yourself up, you are so much stronger than when I first met you. Gods, you have so much left. Your virtue is not you, it’s nothing. You are kind and understanding and strong and utterly amazing. So what, you slept with Lorcan? You are no less of a woman or a person. You are not incomplete. Elide, you are what you make yourself. Don’t be ashamed or afraid to be with the man you love, be happy.”

The witch was right. I guess a couple hundred years with a couple dozen men had served her right. She was more than her virtue, she was so much more. How stupid she was to think that sex with Lorcan was a mistake. It was anything but.

Manon reached over and put her hand over Elide’s. “You’re right,” Elide said. “I know I am.” The Wing Leader smirked. “Now go tell that male you love him, but don’t take so long, our time is limited.”

Elide kissed the witch on her pale cheek. “Thank you.”

As she walked back to her room, she smiled. She had made no mistake, none at all. When she opened the door, she found the Fae sitting straight up, looking confused. He had obviously just woken up. “Elide,” he sighed in relief.

“I’m here. Don’t you worry,” she went over to the bedside and leaned down to kiss him. “But, so is Manon. She came to visit before joining the war effort.”

She leaned into Lorcan, deepening a kiss. “I’m sure she can wait a little while.”

She kissed him more passionately, but soon ended the contact. “We can make up for lost time tonight.”

He groaned. “Hey, Lorcan, you’d be surprised the energy I can build up.”

“Tonight,” he agreed after another long kiss. “I can’t wait.” Lorcan had a way of making her forget what in the ream she was doing, but she somehow remembered the witch that was waiting for her.

“Neither can Manon.”

Elide walked out of the door, her legs teasing the male. As the girl left, Lorcan began counting the minutes until he could see his Elide again. He needed her, and even a day without her would be a struggle. Territorial Fae bastard.


End file.
